What they might really be saying in "Hamlet"

Marcellus
Allrighty then, lets sit down for a second and discuss why there have been many strict alterations in the watchmen schedule suddenly being inforced, and why there are many bronze cannons being made in Denmark and being brought over here. On top of that, why are all of the ship builders so busy that they cannot even afford to get a moments rest on Sunday? Who can explain all of this?

Horatio
I can, or at the very least, explain some of the rumors or stories floating around. As we all very well know, our King, which we just recently saw as a ghost, was a very big and particular rival of Fortinbras, who is the king of Norway. Fortinbras eventually challenged our King to war. Hamlet (or at least we think it was him) was able to kill Fortinbras in battle, and Fortinbras had to give up his land and territories he controlled due to a contract he signed. We dodged a bullet there, because he did not win, our king would have to do the same. But now the son of Fortinbras, also named Fortinbras, has been able to gather a bunch of thugs and goons from outside of the country. He is now going around and, in exchange for food, taking control of some of the land that the late Fortinbras had lost.